Category: Psychology & HR

Ever wondered why certain people are predisposed to certain mental health disorders? Or why your boss is always picking on you? As a psychology and philosophy graduate I aim to understand the workings of the mind and human behavior.

This section will focus primarily on psychology and HR. Psychology enables me to think critically and analyze human behavior in a reasonable way. I try to find reasons behind why people act the way they do given certain circumstances.

With my background in HR I try to look at ways to improve a working environment. The aim is to find ways to make an unpleasant working environment more pleasant.

By combining psychology and HR I wish to equip you with the necessary skills to pick up on small cues and to deal with difficult people at work or in your social life.

Why Regret is Pointless

Let’s discuss why regret is pointless.

It’s one of those gnawing feelings where you’re not sure what you should do and if there even is anything you can do to feel better. It puts your mind in overdrive and you’re thinking at about 1000km/h.

What do you do? What can you do? In this article I hope you give you good reason(s) to believe why regret is pointless and what you can or should do instead.

What is Regret

Regret is feeling sad or disappointed at something you have done or missed out on. It’s something you have either done or not done.

That’s putting it simply. However, regret can go so much deeper and I believe that it’s a mixture of a lot of emotions following an event.

You won’t always feel sad when you did or didn’t do something. You can also feel angry after the fact. Or you can feel like your whole world is falling into pieces because of that “event”. This is why regret is pointless.

It brings up all of these emotions that won’t get you anywhere. It will only make you feel worse, overthink and probably lead to some more bad choices. Not always, but it can.

Why Regret if There is a Solution

According to Neal Roese, a leader in the field of regret research, found that people rated regret to be favorable. This is due to the informational value it gives toward corrective action.

Roese also claims that regret fulfills 5 fuctions:

  • It helps you to make sense of the world
  • It prevents you from future negative behaviors
  • Helps with gaining insight
  • Promotes social harmony
  • Finally, it improves your ability to approach desired opportunities

Reasons Why Regret is Bad For You

Besides the negative emotions, regret can actually have devastating effects on our mental and physical health. This is due to the fact that the one can cause a reaction in the other.

Regret can result in chronic stress. This negatively affects our hormonal and immune system functioning. The worst of all is that it can impede our ability to recover from stressful life events.

That means that regret can affect our overall resiliency. It does so by extending its emotional reach for much longer than it should.

Not only does regret make you quiver from the inside, but prolonged stress (from regret) can lead to mental health conditions such as depression and anxiety.

The result? A compromised immune system and years of therapy. If you ever wondered why regret is bad or pointless, I hope this answers your question. So, what can or should we do instead?

How You Should Be Looking at Regret

Since feelings of regret can’t be stopped or erased altogether, there are a few things that you can do. Let’s have a look:

Reflect

Reflect on what had happened. See what worked and what didn’t. For example a failed relationship. Whether you got dumped or dumped the other person, the same process applies.

Reflect on what worked and what didn’t work in the relationship. All relationships have their strengths and weaknesses but there’s always a reason why they don’t work out. In most cases it’s for the best.

Reflecting will increase your confidence and give you a better understanding of yourself. It will also lead to personal growth.

For more on self reflection and learning of all the benefits that reflecting has to offer, please read my full article here.

Change Thought Patterns

Next, you might want to try changing your thought patterns to something a little more positive. It’s not always easy to do, so take some time to let all your emotions and feelings sink in before attempting to change your thought patterns.

Changing the way we think (about a situation or regret) requires CBT – cognitive behavioral therapy. When the negative thought caused by regret enters your mind, stop, examine and evaluate.

Evaluate the choice you made that resulted in feelings of regret. Do you generally put the blame on others, minimize your feelings, or do you ignore them altogether? This train of thought will result in feeling even worse. Take a breath and know that the choice you made is in the past.

Therefore, be kind to yourself. Having made this one bad choice does not mean you’re doomed to repeat the same mistakes. Learn from the mistake you made and gain some understanding of how to react in a similar situation in the future.

Take Time To Heal

Everyone has their own unique way of healing: Journaling, listening to music or calling a friend. What’s important is that you find time to do the things you like to do to help you heal.

Furthermore, your focus should be on relaxing, nourishing your body and re-energizing in a positive way. Constantly thinking about your regret will only keep those thoughts and feelings ever-present.

Thus, set new goals.

Create A New Set Of Goals

Why is regret pointless? Because it no longer has a hold on your future. That is why. Through reflecting and changing your thought patterns and learning comes understanding.

Through understanding comes knowledge and experience. Use your newly acquired knowledge and experience to set new, realistic goals. Ask yourself the following questions:

  • Is there anything I can do to repair the damage done?
  • Is there anything I can do to respond in a more positive manner to future situations?
  • What can I do to create a more positive outcome for future situations?

Seek Help

Finally, if you seem to struggle too much with your emotions then it might be time to call the professionals. Just like a clogged toilet, not everything can be fixed by ourselves. Sometimes we need to call the professionals before things get too messy.

There’s no shame in asking for help or needing to see a therapist because of something you regret. In most cases you’ll uncover some underlying, deeply buried trauma that’s been stopping you from completely healing. A trained professional can help you with that.

Conclusion

Regret isn’t necessarily something that’s pointless. And it’s not all that bad. Regret can teach us a lot about ourselves. We can learn from our mistakes and make better, more informed decisions in the future.

It can also teach us to be more resilient, better problem solvers and what NOT to do. But more importantly, it teaches us how to heal. And this is why regret is good.

How to Heal Your Dysregulated Nervous System

It may seem like an impossible task to heal your dysregulated nervous system at times. If you’re not sure what it means to have a dysregulated nervous system, please take the time to read the full article here.

As previously mentioned, nervous system dysregulation means you have a sensitive nervous system. It means that physically and psychologically you’re in a constant fight-or-flight mode.

This is extremely unhealthy as it can wreck havoc on not only your physical health, but mental health as well. In this article I hope to provide you with some helpful tips on how to start healing or at least find some relief from a dysregulated nervous system.

Strategies to Heal Your Dysregulated Nervous System

It’s important to note that healing is not a one-size-fits-all process. Each individual heals in their own way. What may work for one person may not work for someone else.

Before trying any of these strategies, please make sure you understand what nervous system dysregulation is, how it manifests and what the signs and symptoms are to look out for.

Just know that you are not broken. Your nervous system is only doing it’s best to keep you alive in any way possible. Unfortunately, dysregulation is the one way it has learnt to cope. So, let’s start to heal your dysregulated nervous system.

Mindfulness and Breathwork

Relaxation and deep breathing techniques can activate the parasympathetic nervous system (for rest and relaxation) informing your mind and body that it is safe to exit the fight, flight, or freeze state.

There are multiple breathing techniques online that you can use and try out to calm your nervous system down. As mentioned before, not all will work for you but it is worth a try.

The box breathing technique requires an inhalation of 4 seconds with a 4 second hold, 4 seconds of exhaling and another 4 second pause before starting the process again. This can be repeated for 3 or 4 rounds.

Another method that can be tried is the Wim Hof method. This may not be for everyone and should be practiced with caution. Preferably it should be practiced with someone watching or guiding.

Personally, I’ve found the Wim Hof method to be longer lasting and much more relaxing. I usually make use of this method before bed to help me sleep. The only time I make use of the box method is during the day when I’m feeling a little overwhelmed.

Regular Physical Activity

If you want your dysregulated nervous system to heal, you have to understand that most of what you’re feeling and going through is due to excess energy.

When your sympathetic nervous system is activated, your brain releases a hormone called adrenaline and norepinephrine. These hormones are responsible for your fight, flight or freeze responses.

Therefore, getting regular exercise will calm you down. It may sound counterintuitive to do but exercise releases endorphins and other feel-good hormones that informs your body that you’re not in danger. Consequently, your nervous system will calm down afterwards.

If you’d like to learn more on how exercise and moving your body helps with mental health, please click here.

Healthy Eating

It should come as no surprise that there is a connection between nutrient rich foods and a healthy nervous system. If you want to heal a dysregulated nervous system, you have to also heal your body – through food!

According to Frontiers for Young Minds, the food we eat has an affect on our neurons. Neurons are the major cells of the brain. Unhealthy foods can cause inflammation of the neurons which could lead to a decrease in mental health.

Neurons communicate with each other and with other organs including muscles. We require uninterrupted communication (messages sent from the brain to other parts of the body / organs) as it allows us to not only perform physical tasks but to also perform cognitive tasks.

Thus, when our brain isn’t working properly it can change the way we think and act. It can also change the way we feel.

Therefore, a diet rich in nutrients like omega-3 fatty acids, antioxidants and magnesium is beneficial for the brain. It can lead to an improvement of formation of neurons, improved attention, thinking and memory.

Getting Enough ZZs

We all know that getting enough sleep is important but did you know it can also help to heal your dysregulated nervous system?

Getting enough sleep can:

  • Have an effect on the size of your testicles and levels of testosterone
  • Reduce your chance of getting a heart attach
  • Increase your ability to retain (new) information
  • Increase cell activity, especially killer cells that fight illnesses like cancer and tumors
  • Reduce stress and improve your mood

Talk to Someone

Social connections are also important when it comes to healing nervous system dysregulation. If you aren’t able to afford seeing a professional, then having a close friend or family member will do just as well.

It’s not always about finding a solution or having someone tell you what is wrong with you. Sometimes all you need is someone who cares, loves and truly listens to you.

Unpacking about what’s going on to a close friend or family member will do wonders for you. They may not have all the answers or knowledge but they have ears and an open heart.

Having close social connections will provide you with feelings of community, support and warmth.

However, when things are really tough and talking to a friend or family member is not enough, I strongly encourage you to seek professional help. At the end of the day they have the knowledge and skills to successfully guide your healing process.

What Does a Dysregulated Nervous System Look Like?

A dysregulated nervous system is a sensitive nervous system. Dysregulation in the nervous system shows up as burnout, anxiety and trauma amongst others.

The problem with living with a dysregulated nervous system is that it can make us respond in seemingly inappropriate ways. It’s not necessarily our fault, however others don’t always understand what we’re going through.

In this article I’ll discuss the following:

  • The manifestation of a dysregulated nervous system
  • Signs of a dysregulated nervous system

The Manifestation of Nervous System Dysregulation

According to MindHealth 360, a dysregulated nervous system is usually caused by some sort of unresolved stress or issue from our past.

However, it can also be caused by a biochemical, psycho-spiritual and / or social-behavioral factors including:

  • Past trauma
  • Chronic stress
  • Substance abuse
  • Major life changes (death of a loved one; divorce; pregnancy etc.)
  • Difficult environmental, economic, social circumstances
  • Autoimmune disease
  • Inflammation

Although we may not always think that certain illnesses can cause a dysregulated nervous system, we have to keep in mind that our bodies interpret threat in the same way whether psychological or physiological.

What is a Dysregulated Nervous System?

A dysregulated nervous system means that there is an imbalance between the parasympathetic and sympathetic branches of the autonomic nervous system.

Let’s break it down:

The autonomic nervous system is divided into two systems namely the sympathetic and parasympathetic systems.

Being in a state of dysregulation is your body’s way of saying that you need to do some more, deeper healing. Find what it is that’s causing the dysregulation and let the healing process begin.

Signs of Nervous System Dysregulation

Suffering from a dysregulated nervous system can show up as burnout, anxiety and past trauma, as mentioned earlier.

During burnout there’s an increase in cortisol and activation of the sympathetic nervous system. This impacts the functional and structural parts of the brain. Sometimes this can look like:

  • Increase in irritability
  • Reduced connection with others and the environment
  • Reduction in empathy with loved ones
  • Brain fog and decrease in concentration
  • Emotionally exhausted
  • Constant tension in the body i.e. stiff neck and shoulders, headaches, back pain and tension in the jaw
  • Struggling with sleep
  • Gastrointestinal distress
  • Mental health conditions
  • Anxiety

Conclusion

If this is the first time you’re hearing of nervous system dysregulation, that’s great. Either you’re learning something about yourself or of someone else close to you.

These individuals are sensitive and feel things differently from those not suffering from nervous system dysregulation. They may be perfectionists resulting in dealing with immense pressure that they place on themselves.

These individuals can also be quite sensitive to judgement from others. This leads them to feel like they constantly need to prove themselves to others.

Sometimes they’re just introverted and keep to themselves. However, this can leave them feeling unsupported. All these factors have a role to play in their resulting burnout.

By being aware of these factors and signs, they can take the necessary steps to either prevent or further complicate their condition. Just remember there is help. The first step is to talk about it.

Overcome Imposter Syndrome: Understand and Conquer Self-Doubt

If you’re wondering how to overcome Imposter Syndrome you firstly have to understand what the term means. Imposter syndrome refers to the inability to accept that your success is deserved or legitimately achieved.

According to the Journal of Mental Health and Clinical Psychology, imposter syndrome prevalence varies widely from 9% to 82%. This is dependent on the recruitment strategy for the study.

Imposter syndrome affects both men and women of all ages. However, the studies done found that an increase in age was associated with a decrease in imposter feelings. There are a few studies that found that age had no effect on the increase or decrease of imposter feelings.

What is Imposter Syndrome?

It may seem impossible at times to overcome imposter syndrome especially when faced with the symptoms, signs or characteristics of it. Some of them include:

  • Feeling like your success was not deserved
  • Having feelings of self-doubt
  • Attributing your success to external factors
  • Sabotaging your own success
  • Having unrealistic expectations and fearing that you can’t live up to them
  • Being unable to realistically assess your own skills and competency
  • Feeling disappointed when you fall short of your own unrealistic / challenging goals

Some (to most) of us feel some of the above on a regular basis. But do we know how it manifests?

Well, imposter syndrome may first start out as just a little gnawing voice in our heads berating us. This can also be referred to as negative self-talk. This eventually becomes a habit and will lead to an increase of a lowered self-esteem, stress and anxiety.

If this continues it can turn into mental health disorders like depression or generalized anxiety disorder. The good news is that imposter syndrome can be overcome.

How Imposter Syndrome Affects the Body

It’s not surprising that imposter syndrome can have psychological as well as physical effects. This is due to the fact that the mind and body is connected. Whatever affects us mentally will surely affect us physically.

Psychological Effects

The psychological effects of imposter syndrome include, but is not limited to:

  1. Anxiety and Stress
  2. Low Self-Esteem
  3. Perfectionism

The reason for this is that we constantly feel pressured to achieve. This pressure can come from our occupation (for instance sales, our bosses or managers), our families

Physical Effects

  1. Fatigue and Sleep Disturbances
  2. Digestive Issues
  3. Headaches and Muscle Tension

Where Imposter Syndrome Comes From

  1. High-Achieving Environments
  2. Early Life Experiences and Upbringing
  3. Comparison Culture and social media

High-achieving environments can include anything from work to family. Sometimes we may find ourselves always feeling the need to compete with another sibling or being the best in the team at work.

Imposter syndrome can also be something we grew up with. Not directly, though. Were you ever told to earn your way to the top or told by others that you didn’t work hard enough to earn your position? It’s easy for others to judge when they have no idea what we o through on a daily basis.

Just remember, we’re not all built the same. What may be easy for some may also be extremely difficult for someone else. Stop comparing yourself and your achievements to others and telling yourself “I don’t deserve this” or “I’m not good enough for this job”.

Be careful of the social media you consume. It can make you feel even worse. Social media has the tendency to exacerbate your feelings of self-doubt and undeserved success.

Strategies to Overcome Imposter Syndromes

There are ways to overcome imposter syndrome or at least to lessen its affects it has on us. Below are a few things you can try to help cope with the negative voice in your mind.

Recognizing and Acknowledging Imposter Feelings

Reframing Negative Thoughts

Cultivating Self-Compassion and Self-Acceptance

  • Practicing Mindfulness and Meditation
  • Learning to Forgive Yourself

Building a Supportive Network

  • Mentors and Role Models
  • Surrounding Yourself with Positive Influences

Harnessing the Power of a Self-Fulfilling Prophecy

The definition of s self-fulfilling prophecy is quite simple: our beliefs about others (or ourselves) lead us to treat them in such a way that they later become exactly what we expect them to be.

This not only applies to the behavior of others, but extends to ourselves and what we tend to believe about our future, our abilities and our skills. Self-fulfilling prophecies can be efficacious or it can be detrimental. It all depends on what we choose to believe.

The focus of this article will be on:

  • What a self-fulfilling prophecy is
  • Other psychological factors at play
  • How you can use it to your advantage

Understanding What a Self-Fulfilling Prophecy is

A self-fulfilling prophecy is the manifestation of a belief or expectation that an individual holds (Ackerman, 2018). It manifests because the individual will unconsciously work to affirm their belief or expectation.

One of the oldest indications of a self-fulfilling prophecy is the story of Oedipus who killed his own father and married his mother. His father, Laius, was told that he would be killed by his son. He therefore abandoned Oedipus and left him to die.

Oedipus was then raised by foster parents assuming they were his real parents. One day he was met with a dire warning – that he would end up killing his father and marrying his widowed mother.

To avoid this from happening he runs away from his foster parents and heads off to the city. There he meets a stranger, ends up in a fight with him and kills him. He proceeds to marry the stranger’s widow.

Only later he finds out that the stranger was his real father and the woman he married was his real mother. By trying to avoid fate, both ended up manifesting their prophecies.

Psychological Mechanisms at Play

However, there are other psychological mechanisms at play when it comes to self-fulfilling prophecies. Sometimes our manifestations are a result of confirmation biases.

A confirmation bias is having a tendency to only view evidence that confirms your existing beliefs or theories. This is something that happens to most people, if not everyone.

An example of this is holding the belief that blond girls are less intelligent than dark-headed girls. Whenever this individual encounter a blond girl that made a silly error, they place greater importance on this “evidence” that is in support of their existing belief.

Holding this belief ultimately leads individuals to treating blond girls in a certain way to make them out to be “dumb” or “dilly”. The same can be applied to any other beliefs we have.

We only look at supporting evidence to confirm our beliefs and then behave in such a way that our circumstances become exactly what we expected them to be or become.

This is also called the Pygmalion effect: where our expectations of others have an impact on our behavior, thoughts and feelings toward them. It is a type of self-fulfilling prophecy that involves interpersonal processes.

The Power of Positive Self-Fulfilling Prophecies

This begs the question – how can we have self-fulfilling prophecies work to our advantage? This might seem like a cliché but positive beliefs shape our actions and attitudes.

Just like holding negative beliefs about yourself can influence your behavior in such a way that you become what you expected, so can positive beliefs do the same.

If you hold the belief that you will do well in a test or at your new job you will most likely:

  • Put in more effort
  • Rebound better from adversity
  • Have better concentration for the task at hand and
  • Be more relaxed while at work or during the test

The cyclical nature of negative self-fulfilling prophecies can be detrimental to our mental health. It can have a devastating effect on the development and deepening of depression and anxiety.

Alternatively, positive self-fulfilling prophecies can be advantageous as it enhances performance and confidence. Studies have shown that athletes and other performers who hold positive expectations tend to outperform those with negative expectations.

Using the Self-Fulfilling Prophecy to Your Advantage

There are various ways in which you can use a self-fulfilling prophecy to your advantage:

How to Develop Resilience

If you want to know how to develop resilience, then you’ve come to the right place. Resilience is your ability to bounce back from hardship and everyday stress. It’s what keeps us from getting and staying depressed and anxious.

In this article we’ll look at some of the following:

  • Why building resilience is important
  • Whether resilience can be developed
  • How you can develop resilience

Why Building Resilience Is Important

In life we face various challenges and uncertainties. These can be experienced in your personal, professional or academic areas like:

  • Losing a friend, family member or loved on
  • Be demoted or suffering a loss of income
  • Failing in a test
  • Not getting accepted into college
  • Getting negative feedback from your boss
  • Didn’t get the job you applied for

These are only a drop in the ocean of challenges that we can face in life. But having resilience is the key trait you need to navigate through adversity. Having resilience will help you to adapt to the situation and keep you functioning optimally when facing adversity.

If you can develop resilience, you will not only grow as an individual, but your mental well-being will be enhanced as well. Having resilience means you are protected from mental health conditions like anxiety and depression.

However, it can also offset factors that can increase your risk of mental health conditions like losing a loved one or past trauma.

Can Resilience Be Developed?

Resilience is not an inherent trait. You can and are able to develop resilience. However, it takes some time and you might consider talking to a mental health professional.

According to a study done by Willmore, Cameron, Yang, Witten & Falkner (Nature, 2022) they found that resilience can be developed, learned and even reinforced. The study was done by placing small mice near larger, more aggressive mice.

They found a link between the displayed defensive behavior (of the smaller mice) and resilience after the stressful event had occurred. The scientists also found that by activating dopamine while defensive could further reinforce resilience.

However, the 2nd group of mice did not display defensive behavior and ended up displaying depression-like symptoms like social avoidance. They also found that stimulating dopamine during the avoidant behavior did not cause the mice to be more resilient.

It would seem that to develop resilience is influenced by various factors such as mindset, body language, support systems, and coping strategies. Your body language can have a great effect on your overall mindset and vice versa.

By making a conscious choice to fight back and adopting the right body language (defensive stance), the researchers found that the mice produced more dopamine which the brain sees as a reward.

You just have to get up, dust off and decide not to dwell on your hardships and your brain will automatically reward you for it. The more you do it, the more it becomes a habit and the less you have to choose to do it. It just becomes second nature to be more resilient in the face of failure, adversity or setbacks.

How to Develop Resilience

Below are 6 steps that you can take to develop resilience.

Cultivating a Growth Mindset

Having a growth mindset is understanding that intelligence and talent is not necessarily something you are born with. These are not static and can change over time.

They change when we learn from our failures and setbacks. It’s understanding that hardship can be a learning opportunity, but you have to actively look at your situation and find what it is you can take from it and learn.

For a full guide on developing a growth mindset, please read my full article here.

Building Strong Social Connections

Part of developing resilience is having strong social connections. These can be built through joining communities, reaching out to friends and family, and participating in group activities.

According to a study done by Yildirim and Celik (2020), a link was found between social support, resilience and overall satisfaction with life. They were able to also establish that resilience predicted life satisfaction.

Social support can enhance close ties with others and help individuals feel like they are part of a group. It also helps with developing social bonds and feeling affiliated. The study claims that different forms of social support can help individuals deal with adversities in life.

Other empirical evidence confirms that social support decreases mental health symptoms related to depression and anxiety, and enhances:

  • Quality of life
  • Life satisfactions
  • Resilience

Therefore, it’s important to have close social ties with friends, family and significant others. It’s more beneficial to your mental and physical wellbeing than being alone.

Developing Effective Coping Strategies

Psychologists (Navsaria, 2020) claim that there are 4 key ingredients when it comes to developing coping skills for resilience:

Connections

Connections here refers to social connections as mentioned above. But to add to this it might be a good idea to also reach out to people on forums that may share the same interests as you.

It can also be beneficial to discuss specific topics related to your problem. This can be used as a reminder that you are not alone in the face of your specific challenges.

Wellness

Wellness includes self-care, nutrition, sleep, hydration, exercise, practicing mindfulness and making space for yourself.

To function optimally emotionally, you have to also function optimally mentally and physically. This can only be achieved if you’re taking care of your body by eating healthily, exercising daily (even if it’s just going for walks), getting enough sleep and drinking plenty of water.

Wellness is also about finding an outlet for your emotions. If journaling helps you do that, then try and create a routine around journaling. Include mindfulness by writing outside and using all of your senses.

Healthy Thinking

Do you think your thoughts are helping you cope or are they negative and unrealistic? Find ways to reframe your thoughts to be more positive and realistic.

When you’re down and struggling mentally, it’s beneficial to identify areas of hope and things that make you feel grateful. Focus on the things that you can change rather than feeling hopeless about the things you cannot.

Find Meaning and Purpose

Break your problems down into smaller, manageable pieces to find solutions. Identify goals that you can start working towards. This will give you a sense of purpose as you’re moving toward something that has meaning for you.

Finally, celebrate your own strength and growth. This will encourage you to continue working towards goals, facing challenges and finding new solutions even in stressful times.

Seeking Professional Help if Needed

Building resilience can be challenging for some individuals. If you are one of those people then seeking professional help, such as therapy, counselling, or a life coach when struggling to develop resilience will be of great benefit to you.

Find someone that you are comfortable with. Most therapists and life coaches will agree to one free discovery call to see if they are a great fit for the client. There is no shame in seeking help with something you don’t know a lot about.

If you are struggling with building resilience, reframing your mindset or achieving your personal goals, then you can always email me on elke.dume@hotmail.com for a free discovery call.

I’m a certified life and personal development coach, and counsellor with years of experience working in a psychiatric hospital. No matter how tough life was at certain times, I still found a way to achieve my goals, grow and become successful and I can help you do the same.

The Foundation of Building a Healthy Relationship

Everyone wants to be loved and give love. To give and equally receive love we need to understand ourselves and what it takes when it comes to building a healthy relationship.

In this article we’ll learn:

  • About the 8 Key components of emotional intelligence in a healthy relationship
  • What’s required of us before entering into a relationship and
  • Overcoming relationship challenges

Building a Foundation for a Healthy Relationship

It’s true that all healthy relationships are built on trust, commitments, respect, holding each other in high regard etc. Some experts even claim that there are 20 factors that form the foundation of a healthy relationship including:

  • Patience
  • Love
  • Laughter
  • Humility
  • Autonomy

And the list just continues. It’s like walking into a Live. Love. Laugh home where everything is perfect.

Although all these components are required to make a relationship work, they should hardly all be placed as being part of the foundation. Before entering into a relationship is where the foundation is created. That is my belief.

You can have patience, autonomy, commitment etc. while in a relationship but if you’re not ready and your foundation wasn’t set prior to entering into the relationship, it may well fail.

Therefore, the two things I believe are necessary before entering into a relationship – which forms part of the foundation – is understanding yourself and building a strong emotional intelligence.

Understanding Oneself Before Engaging in Relationships

Before entering into a romantic relationship, it is important to understand yourself. Knowing and understanding yourself will make it easier to make decisions, honest judgements and retain your own value and worth.

There are a few things you can do to get to know you a little better. Trust me, it’s worth it and you’ll love getting to know you.

Firstly, you’d want to practice self-reflection and self-awareness. When we understand our drives, impulses and influences we’ll have an easier time achieving a happier, fulfilling life. We do this by looking inward and examining our behaviors and emotional responses.

This leads us to identifying personal values and priorities. These are things that we’ve learnt over the years that we find important and prioritize over others. Luckily there are no right or wrong personal values. However, you should be aware of the impact your decisions may have on your life.

Knowing your personal values and not placing them on the backburner when in a relationship will ultimately give you a sense of self-awareness and result in a more fulfilling life.

If you fail to stick to your core values and beliefs you might end up losing your true self and feeling lost within the relationship.

Building a Strong Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence is your ability to be aware of, control and express your emotions in a healthy manner. In a relationship it also means being aware of your partner’s emotions.

According to Angela Bisignano, there are 8 key components to emotional intelligence when it comes to relationships:

  • Friendship: strong relationships are built first through friendship. They care for, support and have mutual affection for each other. Ultimately, they are companions and confidants.
  • Respect: respect means to honor your partner’s needs, wishes and hold them in high regard.
  • Communication: they are able to communicate openly their thoughts, feelings, and needs in a healthy way. The communication is free of criticism and contempt.
  • Conflict management: It’s important to know how to navigate conflict, disagreements and differences. Learning to communicate openly and find compromises will help navigate conflict.
  • Encourage the relationship: having an identity as a couple as well as separate identities as individuals.
  • Healthy boundaries: knowing what your boundaries are and not having them taken for granted.
  • Being aware of each other’s meaning, values and purpose: this translates to what motivates the other and what their passions are.
  • Sharing life: finding ways to connect with each other on a regular basis. Turn toward your partner when you are down AND when thigs are going well.

Forming and Building a Healthy Relationship

When it comes to forming healthy relationships, there are a few things to keep in mind:

There are instances where the idiom opposites attract ring true. However, this may not be the case for most. Having shared interests will lead to better understanding of each other and a stronger connection.

Shared interests are usually what starts a relationship but it’s the values that takes it further. Shared values mean being able to talk about and agree on the big things in life like children, where you want to live and what both parties want for the future.

Furthermore, both parties must be able to openly communicate their big picture without judgement. This is where communication and respect come in. If you are someone that struggles with communication, then please read my full article on developing communication skills.

Finally, you have to be able to show gratitude and appreciation. Your partner will never know when they do something that you enjoy if you don’t show appreciation. It’s saying “thank you” when they do something nice and showing gratitude to indicate how much they matter to you.

Overcoming Relationship Challenges

It should come as no surprise that all relationships have dips. You have disagreements and conflict, but always remember that these are normal. They happen. Imagine how boring life would be if you had a yes-man on your side.

No two people are alike and you will at some point have a difference of opinion. However, there should be certain behaviors that should never be allowed like:

Please also see my full article on 5 Types of Hidden Verbal Abuse if you’re not sure what to look out for.

However, when conflict arise, there are a few things you can learn to do to overcome these relationship challenges:

  • Respecting each other’s’ differences
  • Consider what’s best for you. I’m not saying to take the road at the first sign of struggle, but if you know you’re not treated as an equal, it may be time to reconsider the relationship.
  • Communicate with your partner. I have a rule that I live by: when too emotionally charged I take a break. It’s best to cool down and think everything over before getting into a heated argument.
  • Find a solution that benefits both of you. Both must be motivated and open to change which will lead to a win-win situation.
  • Both parties have to actively listen. Each knows what a win will look like for them, but by active listening they can find a solution that will benefit both.

Conclusion

When building a healthy relationship it’s important to first start with yourself. If you’re not ready, a relationship will not be ready. You have to understand yourself and have a strong emotional intelligence.

There are 8 key components to a healthy relationship each complementing the next. When those are adhered to love, commitment, humility etc. are sure to follow on its own.

Furthermore, the importance of communication and active listening cannot be stressed enough when it comes to building a strong, lasting, and healthy relationship.

Finally, managing conflict in a relationship will lead to a lasting and happy one. Remember there are two people in a relationship. Both need to be happy with the chosen solution, otherwise the conflict will continue.

Navigating Workplace Conflict: Strategies for Effective Resolution

It’s important to address any conflict in the workplace as soon as possible and with as little pain as possible. Conflict resolution in the workplace can lead to greater efficiency and goal achievement when tackled at the root.

If workplace conflict is not resolved in the correct manner it can lead to:

  • Unhappy employees
  • Work disruptions
  • Decrease in productivity
  • Higher levels of absenteeism
  • Higher turnover
  • Probable project failure
  • Termination

This article will help you to better understand conflict in the workplace and where it comes from. It will also show the important role of communication in workplace conflict resolution.

And finally, I’ll provide some tips to mitigate conflict in the workplace and strategies that you can use to resolve conflict when they arise.

Understanding Workplace Conflict

According to Atlas Staffing, there are 6 common workplace conflict forms, namely Interdependence / Task-Based conflicts, Leadership, Work style, Personality-based, Discrimination and Creative idea conflicts.

Interdependence / Task-Based

Disagreements may arise when individuals in an interdependent team have to coordinate their tasks in such a way that everyone can successfully complete their specific task.

The solution is to delegate tasks more effectively. Communication in such situations is crucial. The importance of responsibility and accountability should be communicated to each member of the interdependence team.

Leadership

Each leader equips different leadership styles suited to their own beliefs and personalities. Consequently, everyone also reacts differently to each leadership style.

Leaders should learn to earn respect rather than demand it. They should also accept that they too have to show respect toward their co-workers who are lower on the ranks.

Also, leaders should be aware of their own leadership styles and how this may have an effect on others. If something isn’t working, they should make the necessary adjustments to their own style rather than blaming it on others.

Work Style

As with leadership, there are also different work styles. While some enjoy working alone others prefer working in groups. Some may require external input to get the task done while others need no extra help.

Learn to accept when you’re tasked to do something you don’t necessarily like. Perhaps you don’t do well in groups, but that’s not the group’s fault. Show respect for others and learn to accept things when they aren’t going your way.

Personality-Based

The differences keep on coming. No two people are the same and no one will ever get along with everyone they ever meet or have to work with.

What’s important to remember is that perception is not always reality. We may perceive someone as being rude or a jerk, but that may not be who they really are.

Having some understanding for someone else’s situation can be an aha experience. Show some empathy and when someone is having an off day, why not ask them what’s bothering. Perhaps all they needed was to blow off some steam?

Discrimination

Discriminating based on age, gender, race, ethnicity, cultural background etc. is largely seen as a serious offence inside and outside of the workplace. However, when discrimination happens in the workplace HR usually gets involved.

Companies can tackle this problem before it arises by:

  • Placing emphasis on open-mindedness
  • Acceptance of each other and
  • Understanding of others’ backgrounds, genders etc.

Creative Idea

This type of conflict usually arises during brainstorming activities where either party thinks their idea is superior to the other’s.

This can be resolved when the parties involved can find a compromise which could produce a better outcome. Individuals should always understand and recognize that others have ideas too and should be allowed to voice their opinions.

The consequences of leaving conflict unresolved in the workplace can have devastating effects. It can have an impact on workplace morale, productivity and company culture.

No one wants to work in a toxic environment where the atmosphere is tense and everyone is uncomfortable. This results in people not wanting to be at work leading to:

  • High staff turnover
  • Less days in the office
  • Poor job performance

The Role of Communication in Workplace Conflict Resolution

According to the Army & Navy Academy conflict mostly arises due to poor communication, plan incompatibility, disputes over roles and competition for scarce resources.

Communication is also the only tool required for the resolution of conflict in the workplace. But when used incorrectly it can escalate existing conflict.

By equipping yourself with effective communication skills you’ll be able to get to the root cause of the conflict. This means:

The Crisis Prevention Institute gives the following tips for de-escalating conflict:

  • Be non-judgmental and empathic. Whether or not you agree with what someone else is feeling, those feelings are real for that person. Pay attention to those feelings and don’t judge them for it.
  • Be respectful of others’ personal space. Allowing them their needed space will decrease their anxiety and may prevent the situation form worsening.
  • Be aware of your body language. The more someone loses the control, the less focused they are on words. Ensure you have complete control over your body, face and tone of voice.
  • Avoid over-reacting. It may seem like an impossible task in the moment, but try and remain calm, rational and professional. You may not have control over the other individual but you do have control over your own behavior. How you react may either escalate or diffuse the situation. Choose wisely.
  • Make use of silence for reflection. When used correctly, silence can be a very powerful communication tool.
  • Set clear boundaries. If you find someone else’s behavior defensive, disruptive or belligerent, set clear and simple enforceable boundaries.

Strategies for Workplace Conflict Resolution

Conflict in the workplace can be a great source of pain and frustration. It’s different from conflict with family, friends or loved ones. A lot of the same principles apply, however in a workplace the individual is limited with their reactions and words.

Being limited may cause higher rates of anxiety between individuals and a lot more frustration. When caught up in conflict at work we seem to forget how to think clearly and control our reactions.

Below are 7 helpful tips on how to manage conflict in the workplace.

Acknowledge and Define the Conflict

Being able to define the cause of the problem will help with understanding how it came to grow in the first place. It’s important to discuss which needs are not being met with both parties.

Obtain as much information on the issue as possible. This can be done by asking open-ended questions. This can ensure that both parties also understand the main issue.

Foster Open and Honest Communication

It’s important to find a place that is safe and private to talk. This will put the parties at ease and more likely to talk openly about the situation.

It would be best to not pick a location that is more familiar to either of the parties. Make sure you won’t be interrupted, it’s quiet and comfortable.

Actively Listen

Remember to listen to understand rather than listening to react or respond. Try not to interrupt either of the parties as they give their recount of the situation.

Remember to set ground rules when necessary and treat both parties as equally important. Each tend to think they are in the right.

Gather Information and Perspectives

As an HR representative, you have to do your due diligence by investigating the situation as properly as possible. Make use of all the resources available to you before coming to a conclusion.

Do not go into this with a biased mind. This will lead to you only looking at things that affirms your bias and missing clues that are against it.

Reach a Mutually Acceptable Agreement

The main purpose of conflict resolution is not only to resolve the conflict but to ensure it doesn’t become in problem in the future.

After following the previous steps, sit down with both parties and brainstorm ideas that would be beneficial to both parties and the company.

Identify Common Goals and Interests

Now that everyone has agreed to the best solution it is time to determine each individual’s responsibilities in the resolution.

Remember to emphasize that both parties ultimately have the same goals in mind. They need to find common ground and decide on their responsibilities forward to avoid conflict in the future.

Check In

HR Cloud calls this “Evaluate how things are going and decide preventative strategies for the future”. However, checking in sounds more personal. Individuals need to feel like they’ve been heard and understood.

Constantly handing out more demands and being evaluated may make them feel less-than. Therefore, checking in with them to see how things are going will likely result in an honest answer.

This will be an indicator whether the problem is finally resolved or if there are still underlying problems that need to be addressed.

Building a Conflict-Resilient Workplace Culture

A conflict resilient workplace does not solely focus on formal dispute processes alone. Rather, they emphasize positive relationships and strong communication. This results in early conflict management by people directly involved and with the most appropriate response.

An integrated conflict management model will identify the root causes and symptoms of the problem. This information is then shared to bring about the necessary changes.

It makes use of alternative dispute resolution methods with the focus on preservation of workplace relationships. It addresses the needs and interests of the parties rather than their rights. Simultaneously, it encourages self-resolution by incorporating training and awareness raising.

However, certain situations are serious and require a proper, structured and formal grievance process. Organizations have a legal requirement to have a formal grievance process and procedure.

Therefore, a conflict-resilient workplace makes use of a formal grievance process when necessary. However, through conflict prevention and early-resolution an escalation to formal processes can be prevented.

How to Improve Communication and Active Listening

Communication is an essential aspect of our everyday lives, enabling us to express thoughts, ideas, and emotions with others. In this article we’ll learn how to improve our verbal and non-verbal communication and employ active listening.

This article will also discuss the following:

  • Organizing our thoughts before speaking
  • Importance of the language we use either in a work setting or personal life
  • How to have an active and engaged conversation
  • The role of body language, tone of voice and active listening in improving non-verbal communication

Learning How to Improve Verbal Communication Techniques

Effective verbal communication techniques can enhance our ability to convey messages clearly, engage in meaningful conversations, and build strong relationships.

By employing these verbal communication techniques, individuals can improve their ability to express themselves clearly, connect with others more effectively, and establish meaningful relationships.

Organizing Thoughts Before Speaking

Organizing your thoughts before speaking can hold major benefits, especially so in the workplace. Some of the benefits include:

  • Communicating with fluency
  • Appearing to be more charismatic
  • Being able to get your point across
  • Using less filler words like “uhm” or “uh” and stuttering
  • Enables you to clearly outline your ideas

However, organizing your thoughts before speaking also holds benefits in any relationship. Just think back on every time you were so mad at someone you felt like the Hulk ready to destroy anything in your way.

Instead of lashing out, first organize your thoughts and think clearly before reacting on impulse. Here are several ways you can better organize your thoughts before speaking:

If you’d like to learn more on the benefits of exercise, please see my full article: The Role of Exercise on Mental Health.

The Importance of Language, Vocabulary and Jargon for Improving Communication Skills

It’s important to make use of the appropriate language and vocabulary. You want to use language that is appropriate to your audience and your situation.

Here are a few language tips to keep in mind for the workplace:

  • Avoid using foul language. You’ll only create a bad impression of yourself. Using curse words brings no value to the conversation.
  • Avoid engaging in office gossip. It’s the easiest way to set yourself up for ridicule. Gossip is negative in nature and is disrespectful toward the person who is being gossiped about.
  • Stay positive. People enjoy positive vibes in the workplace. And keeping positive will likely land you a promotion. Using positive statements and having positive thoughts will improve your work performance and affect your behavior in a positive manner.
  • Expand your vocabulary. You don’t want to be the only person in the room that doesn’t understand business jargon. Make an effort to learn new words and make use of the correct grammar. The best way to do this is by reading. Make sure you understand the big words. Using appropriate words and grammar will help you sound professional.
  • Finally, leave your personal life at home.

Using proper language in your personal life is different from the language you use in an office setting. Here are a few things to keep in mind in your personal life:

  • You want to avoid sounding like Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory. Meaning, don’t sound like a know-it-all or a robot.
  • Be mindful of your audience. Be able to adjust your language and vocabulary based on those around you. Take into account their age, cultural backgrounds / sensitivities and educational backgrounds.
  • Respect their boundaries. Avoid using offensive or derogatory language, making inappropriate jokes or comments. Be considerate of others’ feelings.
  • Be polite and courteous. This means remembering to say “please” and “thank you” when appropriate and making use of correct titles and pronouns when addressing others.
  • Avoid gossiping.

Active and Engaged Conversation

  1. Asking open-ended questions to encourage dialogue. If you’re not sure what to ask or how to keep a conversation going, you can check out some of these questions in a previous article of mine.
  2. Paraphrasing and summarizing to ensure understanding. You don’t have to repeat everything verbatim. Summarise the main points of what the other person has just shared with you.
  3. Expressing empathy and showing genuine interest. Again, this can be conveyed by using open-ended questions and summarizing or paraphrasing. You would also need to take note of your body language. Having a closed body may not be effective when trying to show empathy or interest.
  4. Avoid interrupting the other person mid-sentence. It will show disrespect towards them.
  5. Be as non-judgemental as possible. Sometimes someone will say something that you don’t particularly agree with. That’s okay. If you want the conversation to continue, it’s best to not seem judgemental. It will likely end the conversation right then and there.

Being attentive to the other person holds benefits to the relationship for both parties. The other person will be more inclined to verbalize at greater length and will respond better and more positively.

Learning How to Improve Non-Verbal Communication

While verbal communication is crucial for conveying messages, non-verbal communication techniques play an equally important role in our interactions.

Non-verbal cues, such as body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice, provide rich information that can greatly influence how our messages are perceived and understood.

Body Language for Improving Communication and Active Listening

Body language does not only include the body, but the facial expressions too. Facial expressions convey basic emotions. However, micro expressions may give away when you are lying. Always be aware of your face and facial expressions especially when you’re having a deep conversation with someone.

On the other hand, we have body language which can be used to enhance the verbal message. Sometimes we don’t have the right words to express how we feel or what we’re trying to say. That’s where proper body language comes in.

Using the correct body language you’ll be able to appear more positive, approachable and engaging.

More information can be found on Mind Tools

Tone of Voice

Tone of voice can be instrumental when it comes to communication. A simple phrase can have varying meanings depending on the tone of voice used.

Your tone can affect not only how people perceive you but also their willingness to continue listening to you. Tone can drastically change the meaning of your words.

If we’re not mindful of our tone it can open opportunities for miscommunication. A misaligned tone can also create confusion and misinterpretation. Hence, why being conscious of our tone is so important.

Luckily there are ways you can use your tone to improve your communication skills:

  1. Ensure your tone matches your message. Congratulating a colleague on a job well done should preferably not be done in a low tone. Instead, it should be upbeat and with a smile. Unless you want to sound snarky.
  2. You can use your tone of voice to build rapport. Ensure your tone is friendly and likable as this can result in a positive connection and may build trust. A welcoming tone can be used to strengthen relationships and create a positive working environment.
  3. Listen attentively when someone responds negatively toward our tone. Rather pause and reflect on how our tone may have influenced the received reaction. Our tone can indicate tensions and feelings brewing underneath the surface that we may not be aware of.

Active Listening

According to Arlin Cuncic, active listening is about seeking to understand the meaning of what is being said. And this is key to learning how to improve on your communication skills.

”It requires being an active participant in the communication process.” Some of the listening techniques include:

  • Being present in the conversation
  • Being aware of body language. Not only your own, but of the other person(s)
  • Making use of open-ended questions to encourage a flowing conversation
  • Listening to understand rather than to react or respond
  • Being non-judgemental
  • Having good eye contact
  • Paraphrasing and summarizing
  • Avoiding interruptions and distractions

Conclusion

Learning how to improve your communication skills can take some time and practice. You have to be aware of the language you use, your tone of voice, body language and facial expressions.

It’s a whole mouthful but taking the time to master each of these separately will surely get you on the right track to being a more responsive, confident individual when it comes to speaking.

Conveying the right message with the right tone, grammar and language may even give you a more positive outlook within your personal as well as professional life.

What is a Psychopath and How to Identify One

What is a psychopath and how can we identify someone as a psychopath? How does a psychopath differ from a sociopath?

Currently, the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM) 5 does not make provision for either of the two. Instead, it placed the two terms under, what we know to day as, antisocial personality disorder.

However, there are still some researchers, psychologists and psychiatrists that believe the two terms should be looked at separately as their causes may differ along with some symptoms and traits.

This article will look at some of the following:

  • What is a psychopath and how does it differ from a sociopath
  • The role of the brain in psychopathology
  • The role of the environment in psychopathology
  • Traits of a psychopath
  • Reasons why the DSM-5 no longer differentiates between psychopath and sociopath
  • Difference in behavior between a psychopath and sociopath

What is a Psychopath?

What is a Psychopath?

A psychopath is someone who suffers from psychopathy. Or better known as antisocial personality disorder (ASPD). However, sociopathy also falls under this spectrum disorder and may be confused for psychopathy.

The two are not the same which makes it difficult to diagnose for mental health professionals.

Someone suffering from psychopathy may typically experiences four or more of the following symptoms:

  • Unable to conform to social norms
  • Impulsive
  • Deceitful
  • Irritable and aggressive
  • Reckless disregard for the safety of others
  • Lack of remorse
  • Irresponsible

The Role of The Brain in Psychopathy

Researchers found that 47% of prisoners world wide were diagnosed with ASPD. Neuroimaging research suggests that those suffering from ASPD may be as a result of abnormal brain anatomy.

Studies found an 11% decrease in prefrontal grey matter volume in ASPD and a reduced white matter fiber bundle, which connects the fronto-temporal and fronto-parietal control networks.  

Traditionally researchers have mostly focussed on things that psychopaths lacked:

  • Sensitivity to punishment
  • Lack of fear

However, these traits are not good at predicting violent or criminal behavior (Zald, 2018). So, they changed their focus to that which psychopaths have in abundance:

  • Impulsivity
  • Attraction to rewards
  • Risk-taking

These traits were found to be more closely linked to violent and criminal behavior.

During multiple tests via PET and fMRI scans, researchers came to the following conclusions:

  • Those with psychopathic traits had an exaggerated dopamine response to both amphetamines and reward anticipation.
  • Once such an individual focussed on a reward, they are unable to switch their attention until they get what they wanted.
  • The anticipation or motivation for reward overrides the possible punishment and fear they may have.  

In Freudian terms, their Id would be the driver of their behavior while the ego takes the passenger seat and superego takes the backseat.

Frontal Lobes

The role of the frontal lobes are to navigate voluntary movement, language expression and managing higher executive functions. These include:

  • The capacity to plan
  • Organise
  • Initiate
  • Self-monitor and control of responses for the purpose of goal achievement

 The Fronto-Parietal Network

This part of the brain is responsible for the following executive functions:

  • Problem solving
  • Maintaining and manipulating information in working memory
  • Decision making in for the purpose of goal achievement.

Prefrontal Cortex

The prefrontal cortex is involved with regulating our thoughts, actions and emotions via connections with other brain regions. These connections are made possible through white matter. Gray matter on the other hand, facilitates information processing.

The Role of The Environment in Psychopathy

What is a psychopath if not an unfortunate product of abnormal genetics? Well, the environment may also play a role in nurturing these abnormal genes (brain structure and chemistry).

Some researchers have returned to making use of the terms “sociopath” and “psychopath”. According to them “psychopath” refers to a genetic causation while “sociopath” is more likened to a less dangerous individual, but a product of their environment.

So then, what role does the environment play in the causation of a psychopath? According to the Psychiatric Times, psychopaths often grow up in homes with the following characteristics:

  • A chaotic family home
  • Have a lack of parental guidance and attention
  • Parents that abuse substances
  • Parents that display antisocial behavior
  • Have poor interpersonal relationships
  • Adverse neighborhoods

Such individuals may often feel like they had less opportunities or advantages when compared to other “normal” people.

However, the question remains: Even if a psychopath’s environment was normal, in a normal safe neighborhood, no substance abuse, divorce or poor relationships, would they not still display psychopathic tendencies?

I believe that regardless of their environment, a psychopath will still display psychopathic tendencies due to their abnormal brain structure, genetics and hormonal imbalances.

The only difference in environment may bring is the degree in which these tendencies are displayed. A good, healthy, nurturing environment may lessen the degree of displayed psychopathy – teaching the individual between right and wrong and how to deal with negative emotions like anger and frustration.

A negative environment, as listed above, will only do the opposite resulting in more violent crimes and possibly a full cut-off from the normal world.

Traits of a Psychopath

A Canadian researcher, Robert Hare, developed a 20-item Hare Psychopathy Checklist in the 1970s. This checklist features different traits and each are scored on a three-point scale based on how applicable the trait is to an individual.

  • 0 does not apply
  • 1 applies to a certain extent and
  • 2 fully applies

The revised checklist includes the following traits:

Many of these traits coincide with that of a narcissist, or someone with narcissistic personality disorder. When it comes to diagnosing an individual with a personality disorder it’s important to know all the signs and symptoms of these disorders.

It’s a difficult task for a mental health professional to make the correct diagnosis. Since many individuals display symptoms in varying degrees, incorrect diagnoses are inevitable.

We see this regularly, and not only with personality disorders. Some examples would include:

  • According to a study at Durham University, around 80% of females with autism are misdiagnosed. Rather they are diagnosed with bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder, eating disorders, depression or anxiety.
  • Bipolar disorder is another example. According to the NIH 67% of patients were overdiagnosed with bipolar disorder. However, a misdiagnosis is also quite common (about 20%) due to sharing similar symptoms with other mental health conditions.

What Does the DSM-5 Say?

As Extrapolated from the DSM-5

As you can notice there is no longer a specific section for sociopathy nor psychopathy. Both fall into the category of antisocial personality disorder.

In the past sociopathy and psychopathy was seen as separate, but since they share similar traits, they have been placed under the same category in the DSM. According to Houser (2015), psychopathy focused more on the cognitive and personality traits associated with the personality disorder. Sociopathy had its focus on the behavioral aspects.

As noted earlier, psychopaths exhibit abnormalities in brain anatomy which coincides with placing the focus on the cognitive aspects associated with ASPD.

Psychopath vs. Sociopath: Traits

Simply put, here are some of the differences that you can expect from a psychopath vs. a sociopath:

Conclusion

There is a clear difference between a psychopath and a sociopath although some traits may share similarities. The problem with distinguishing the two in a clinical setting is the abnormalities of the brain.

Unfortunately, brain scans and research cannot be conducted on each individual who exhibits traits associated with psychopathy. It would just be too expensive and time-consuming.

Therefore the simple solution is to place the two terms under a single diagnosis: ASPD or APD. This may reduce the likelihood of a misdiagnosis.

There’s a lot of research still being conducted around people who suffer from this mental health condition and why they are the way they are.

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