How to Develop Resilience

If you want to know how to develop resilience, then you’ve come to the right place. Resilience is your ability to bounce back from hardship and everyday stress. It’s what keeps us from getting and staying depressed and anxious.

In this article we’ll look at some of the following:

• Why building resilience is important
• Whether resilience can be developed
• How you can develop resilience

Why Building Resilience Is Important

In life we face various challenges and uncertainties. These can be experienced in your personal, professional or academic areas like:

• Losing a friend, family member or loved on
• Be demoted or suffering a loss of income
• Failing in a test
• Not getting accepted into college
• Getting negative feedback from your boss
• Didn’t get the job you applied for

These are only a drop in the ocean of challenges that we can face in life. But having resilience is the key trait you need to navigate through adversity. Having resilience will help you to adapt to the situation and keep you functioning optimally when facing adversity.

If you can develop resilience, you will not only grow as an individual, but your mental well-being will be enhanced as well. Having resilience means you are protected from mental health conditions like anxiety and depression.

However, it can also offset factors that can increase your risk of mental health conditions like losing a loved one or past trauma.

Can Resilience Be Developed?

Resilience is not an inherent trait. You can and are able to develop resilience. However, it takes some time and you might consider talking to a mental health professional.

According to a study done by Willmore, Cameron, Yang, Witten & Falkner (Nature, 2022) they found that resilience can be developed, learned and even reinforced. The study was done by placing small mice near larger, more aggressive mice.

They found a link between the displayed defensive behavior (of the smaller mice) and resilience after the stressful event had occurred. The scientists also found that by activating dopamine while defensive could further reinforce resilience.

However, the 2^nd group of mice did not display defensive behavior and ended up displaying depression-like symptoms like social avoidance. They also found that stimulating dopamine during the avoidant behavior did not cause the mice to be more resilient.

It would seem that to develop resilience is influenced by various factors such as mindset, body language, support systems, and coping strategies. Your body language can have a great effect on your overall mindset and vice versa.

By making a conscious choice to fight back and adopting the right body language (defensive stance), the researchers found that the mice produced more dopamine which the brain sees as a reward.

You just have to get up, dust off and decide not to dwell on your hardships and your brain will automatically reward you for it. The more you do it, the more it becomes a habit and the less you have to choose to do it. It just becomes second nature to be more resilient in the face of failure, adversity or setbacks.

How to Develop Resilience

Below are 6 steps that you can take to develop resilience.

Cultivating a Growth Mindset

Having a growth mindset is understanding that intelligence and talent is not necessarily something you are born with. These are not static and can change over time.

They change when we learn from our failures and setbacks. It’s understanding that hardship can be a learning opportunity, but you have to actively look at your situation and find what it is you can take from it and learn.

For a full guide on developing a growth mindset, please read my full article here.

Building Strong Social Connections

Part of developing resilience is having strong social connections. These can be built through joining communities, reaching out to friends and family, and participating in group activities.

According to a study done by Yildirim and Celik (2020), a link was found between social support, resilience and overall satisfaction with life. They were able to also establish that resilience predicted life satisfaction.

Social support can enhance close ties with others and help individuals feel like they are part of a group. It also helps with developing social bonds and feeling affiliated. The study claims that different forms of social support can help individuals deal with adversities in life.

Other empirical evidence confirms that social support decreases mental health symptoms related to depression and anxiety, and enhances:

• Quality of life
• Life satisfactions
• Resilience

Therefore, it’s important to have close social ties with friends, family and significant others. It’s more beneficial to your mental and physical wellbeing than being alone.

Developing Effective Coping Strategies

Psychologists (Navsaria, 2020) claim that there are 4 key ingredients when it comes to developing coping skills for resilience:

Connections

Connections here refers to social connections as mentioned above. But to add to this it might be a good idea to also reach out to people on forums that may share the same interests as you.

It can also be beneficial to discuss specific topics related to your problem. This can be used as a reminder that you are not alone in the face of your specific challenges.

Wellness

Wellness includes self-care, nutrition, sleep, hydration, exercise, practicing mindfulness and making space for yourself.

To function optimally emotionally, you have to also function optimally mentally and physically. This can only be achieved if you’re taking care of your body by eating healthily, exercising daily (even if it’s just going for walks), getting enough sleep and drinking plenty of water.

Wellness is also about finding an outlet for your emotions. If journaling helps you do that, then try and create a routine around journaling. Include mindfulness by writing outside and using all of your senses.

Healthy Thinking

Do you think your thoughts are helping you cope or are they negative and unrealistic? Find ways to reframe your thoughts to be more positive and realistic.

When you’re down and struggling mentally, it’s beneficial to identify areas of hope and things that make you feel grateful. Focus on the things that you can change rather than feeling hopeless about the things you cannot.

Find Meaning and Purpose

Break your problems down into smaller, manageable pieces to find solutions. Identify goals that you can start working towards. This will give you a sense of purpose as you’re moving toward something that has meaning for you.

Finally, celebrate your own strength and growth. This will encourage you to continue working towards goals, facing challenges and finding new solutions even in stressful times.

Seeking Professional Help if Needed

Building resilience can be challenging for some individuals. If you are one of those people then seeking professional help, such as therapy, counselling, or a life coach when struggling to develop resilience will be of great benefit to you.

Find someone that you are comfortable with. Most therapists and life coaches will agree to one free discovery call to see if they are a great fit for the client. There is no shame in seeking help with something you don’t know a lot about.

If you are struggling with building resilience, reframing your mindset or achieving your personal goals, then you can always email me on elke.dume@hotmail.com for a free discovery call.

I’m a certified life and personal development coach, and counsellor with years of experience working in a psychiatric hospital. No matter how tough life was at certain times, I still found a way to achieve my goals, grow and become successful and I can help you do the same.